Taurus (April 20-May 20) Travel will enable new romantic encounters and additional cultural enlightenment. You are about to find the love of your life, your soulmate. Sadly, she doesn’t like walking anywhere but the mall and finds the outdoors intolerable. The stars know which you’ll choose.

Gemini (May 21-June 20) If you're willing to cut loose the fabric shackles that impede you, you may find success at the nudist camp cache. You may be repulsed by what you see there, but the stars are just as nauseated.

Cancer (June 21-July 22) This is not the month for you to be trying new things. Put off Polar Bear Club sponsored geocaches until the water warms up a bit. You know how you whimper like a baby in the cold water.

Leo July (23-August 22) You'll be too busy with business and domestic affairs to geocache at all this month. Your spouse, who had previously complained about your frequent absence, will long to see July when you’ll be gone again. It’s nothing personal, you’re just not a lot of fun to be around.

Virgo (August 23-September 22) You are aging like a fine wine, your alcohol content is increasing and you’re becoming more pungent every day.

Libra (September 23-October 22) The stars see injury and embarrassment for you this month. They started to say that you’d be closing an ammo can on some sensitive part of your body, but were so aghast they couldn’t finish.

Scorpio (October 23-November 21) Remember that cache camera you took the self portrait with last summer? Someone has cropped your head onto a porn star’s body and placed you in a very compromising position. Best to lay low for a while.

Sagittarius (November 22-December 21) Find a quiet spot where you can enjoy geocaching without the bother of pesky onlookers. That same rule applies to public urination and naturalist sunbathing as well.

Capricorn (December 22-January 19) The stars have a warrant for your arrest. It seems Little Twinkly has come up missing in one of the constellations. You were the last to be seen with it. I hope your alibi is good.

Aquarius (January 20-February 17) For the first time since you started playing this game you have tasted failure. It is a bitter taste indeed. In fact, it’s making you gag right now isn’t it? Well, sometimes your first day doesn’t go so well. Try again tomorrow.

Pisces (February 18-March 19) You know the feeling when you’re way out on a remote cache hunt, when you’re sitting alone on the forest floor with the cache opened in front of you, when the only sounds you hear are the birds chirping your success, and the world is at peace around you? You know, that feeling? There’s a cougar behind you.

Aries (March 20-April 19) The warm spring weather will welcome you this month. Get out there and enjoy it, live it up and take those risks now. You’ll be in the hospital in traction in July, so make the most of June.